Green Onions

最近～我爱上了上野树里
lately~im in love with ueno juri

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those who is not watching '快乐女声‘ or 'happy girl voice', this singing contest tv show in china probably is not familiar with this singer's name.
after listening to her sing on the show, i was hooked. though to many many people in china, she was probably the devil of off key music.
she writes and performs her own music. and it is exactly her unique and "faulty" way of singing that not only made me want to listen to mandarin music again but to actually make me feel incredibly calm and vulnerable. when was the last time i felt that?
her music just have so much feel to it

here is one of her most famous song 'zui tian shi', recored on her own


not only am i hooked onto yico but i am hooked onto this show. some great performers!

while i was in china, i joked to my cousin and my family members that i will audition for this contest next time they hold it again haha. but who knows when that will be really

all is quiet on the eastern front
until the bad news came along
and you are left wondering why
does it have to be so hard, just to die?

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boil and toil and bubble and trouble
for they want a title and i want the post
they try to finish their job but i make the most
the most to them is always a change of heart
but i say it is for the better, even if i risk it all

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one has her own plan and the others have theirs
it is a compromise no less
the others want to make it easy, but one forbid it so
to give into a system of simple solution and peace wanting goal
perhaps the certain age make them stale, for their heart no longer beat faster so
experience and difference clash and apart
but the others hold the upper cards, too bad, make bends

---------

no wonder i am so screwed up in certain departments. they are like machines and robots working day after day without passion. so regulated and numb to the new. one thing i pity about the disgrace of old

is it possible to deny the mental process of growing old?

too old for life's roller coaster ride?

my last entry was much on fire. with my rants toward clarks shoe company. well, that got resolved. i emailed the customer service and they contacted the store and agree an exchange for my shoes. so not so terrible after all.

been watching the L word season 1 while i sew beads onto tights (dont ask...long story) and i thought the show would be rather cheesy with what all these fan videos on youtube being rather too sentimental that almost felt like ridiculously soft porn with water sign emotions, but the show turned out to be rather good. even better than sex and the city. which i thought was rather silly at times, which contributed to it's humorous values.
what pissed alot of fans off and me as well was the dismiss of the character, marina, whom i thought was my favorite character in the show. but the show must go on as they say.

im off to work now. so busy busy.

my mom complain of me being too aggressive and passionate, of course, i am too young to be calm. i suppose i have been melancholy for too long to stand it now.

this past week has been shitty overall, not all the time but quite.

avonshop.co.uk is a shitty site. full of problems. though their products are still good.

CLARKS, how tragic. my first time buying something from them, after hearing so much good about how comfortable their shoes are. after only wearing the sandals i got for an hour i start to get problem. blisters, scratches etc etc. the sandals are possibly one of the worst pair of shoes i worn in a long time. after putting the sandals away for a couple weeks, thinking if my blisters heal and i managed to "break down" the shoes after wearing it for 3 days straight, it wouldnt hurt as much. but it did and made new scratches. how terrible it is to pay £50 for a pair of clarks shoes and got the exact opposite of what it preaches to be. and the service, the service is bad. of course they dont have that customer satisfaction garantee crap, because why would they give a shit about that? so even when the customer knows the shoe is crap and they know the shoe is crap, they wouldnt refund me the money or exchange for another pair of shoes because they are just out to get you moo-lah. if the shoes were just £10 i probably wouldnt get all pissy since you get what you paid for right? but when i pay £50, that is $100 for a pair of crap, i want my money back.
dont get me started on the store customer service, TERRIBLE

i will most likely not be doing business with them in a long long time.

for months i had my big extendable table downstairs in the living room and the only use for it was holding big dinner parties...
last night, all of a sudden, i wanted to bring my big table up to my room so i can work. perhaps it was caused by my lazing around the whole day and not getting anything done. anyways, i was so excited, didnt felt like sleeping despite i had to wake up early today.
i put my bean bag chair and "coffee table" underneath and can pull out the bag when i want to relax and watch a movie or something.
was having a bit of a melt down with my room lately and suddenly, bam, it's perfect again.



been listening to a lot of peggy lee and amy winehouse these days. just adore peggy lee's songs, some are so cheeky! her songs reminds me of 'chicago' for some reason.

also, i finished watching ocean trilogy and all i can say is, damn. i had to say ocean's 13 is my fav out of the 3, for a sec i thought 'bank' was valentino! i wonder if they gonna make a ocean's 14. but movies usually end on a trilogy...or not?

since i dont have a 'page view' tracker for my blog, i have no idea what is the traffic of my page. now, just me thinking i am one among the millions of bloggers out there, no one sees this page expect...maybe me, midori and well...no one else really haha. but today, my theory was proven wrong, there are people lurking in the dark reading my blog. now, i dont accuse, naturally, the web is never discrete.

anyways, the net gives me the creeps.

but since there are people who view my page, buy my shoes!!!

i dont know why, im feeling mighty tired these days. perhaps it's because of my disturbed sleeping time on thursday night and created a series of disturbed cycles. im seriously yawning one after another and even if i go out and i fall asleep on the bus, even if it was only a 15 minute ride. anyways, this week is both shitty and great. it started out great, ended with a bit of a twisted sour note.

on monday, i was shhhed
next day i had tailoring class and we started cutting out the jacket. im excited! i chose a paneled jacket that needed altering because it was just a shapeless thing.
on wednesday i was shhhed again =x
on thursday, i went to pick up my passport with my chinese visa in it and went to davie street to have my essay tutorial. i did some inspiration research for my design project and the tutorial was as predicted. went to holborn's csm library to return a book than sat down and read for a good 3 hours non stop, phew, my eyes hurt and i was hungry than i went home to what will be later a tiring and semi pissed off retreat to a late sleep and early wake up.
on friday i had school and it was alright, started my design project. things happened of course but now im getting a bit tired to listing all of them.
yesterday, i went to gold hawk road to buy some lining for my jacket and because the traffic on the weekend is always a little worrying, i had to take the tube. brought this quite lovely poly-satin fabric in sky blue and got some fabric samples for my design project. than i went to central to selfridges to do my seasonly check up on the balenciaga garments. it really is a wonderful thing to be able to touch and feel and see up close their garments. i get such a kick out it. as expected, i saw the 'couture tape' dress that i been wanting to see ever since the show came out. it was different than what i expected. the fabric was hard, and it seems to be woven with clear, almost fishing wire like thread with these what i am guessing, the 'couture tape' that gave the garment this shiny, metallic look. in a way i am also a little doubting whether what i saw was the ss collection or the pre-ss collection because a lot of the pre-ss pieces are STILL on the hangers. i than went over to the new givenchy booth next door and though i am less stunned after encounting with balenciaga, it was still very lovely. nothing is that stunning after balenciaga anyways. later ventured into stella mccartney's booth, and all i can give is just a disgusted look on my face. her stuff are as boring as plain water but even plainer.

and today, well, i have the right to be calmer today now dont it. stay home...not do much XD
feel so tired anyways. perhaps i will work my essay or design work.

so im going to update a bit since im sort of stalling to do my essay for cultural studies class. it's alright of a class. i want to get it done and over with as soon as possible and i do want to do alright on it as well. but im probably not working my ass off to strive for a really good mark but at least a decent.

oddly, these days have been going well. everything seems to be falling into where they are suppose to be. i got my passport and now im going to get a visa to go to china. and i am going to xian while i am at it where my cousin is studying, where my dad also studied at before. marie also kindly offered to let me stay for a couple days in hongkong and take me around since i never actually toured hk though i passed through it many times. and my trip to antwerp is coming along. midori has prompted to come too and is going to stay in london while she's at it. i went to bristol for a weekend last week, it was nice to get out of london. it was incredibly quite there and very hilly. i went to one of the libraries belonging to university of bristol and it was bit odd being in a proper university. it was a bit like being in high school again. during my stay there, my feet hurt because i wore these new sandals i got a day before and i didnt bring any other pair of shoes! because my feet hurt so much, i didnt go anywhere.
summer internship also seems like it is falling into place as well. if everything goes well than i can book my plane tickets after i get my visa!
can't wait for summer to come around. so fast, seems like not too long ago i was going to edinburgh and paris around this time last year. now i have to finish my course and my essay. there are still dull things to do for my course...like finishing my pocket samples! my tutor said she wouldnt let us graduate if we dont have everything, samples, notes and the jacket of course. how scary. i also think i failed my 2nd term since i never showed my design sketches. and my design tutor never manages to find my course director when he needs to.

been wanting to make clothes a lot these days. was looking at vogue sewing patterns and is quite tempted to buy some. especially these original 40s designs that are quite interesting. will see if i can get some.

these days are very much sunny, these days are very much blue... as in blue sky

it's been a week since i got back from toronto but it already felt like ages. maybe because i did so much already. i been out everyday trying to get things done. on monday i went to school and try and get my homework done but i manage to get just half of what i was meant to do finish and i went to the library to return some cds. than i went home and went out again to get my debit card in chinatown, later i had a cup of tea and ice cream near by. on tuesday i have tailoring class as usual than stay behind for a bit and try to get something done but i was pretty beat by than. on wednesday i went to apple store to get my computer airport problem fixed but missed my appointment, had some korean for lunch than i went for my toni and guy color appointment in the afternoon. cathy came by the academy and we had a light bite at starbucks and talked for a bit about various things. on thursday i went for my cultural studies where they changed the location and the tutors are improving, not so sleepy now, though i still felt tired. went to csm to wait for kelly so we can have dinner at friday's later that night. she was making toile for a graduating student who interned at margiela and balenciaga, cool eh. making toile took a while since the pieces were bit confusing and the machines were not behaving. the dress was well patterned and definitely looks balenciaga inspired. on friday i had cutting class and went in to draft a jacket pattern, got my tuesday homework done which are a pair of sleeves. today i went to apple store again for my new appointment, i arrived early and got my problem fixed. yay. than i wandered around oxford circus and had an urge of wanting to buy some new clothes. i was gonna pop down to top shop since they were "on sale" but i wandered into zara first since it was on my way to top shop. surprisingly they had a lot of silk dresses, though lined with polyester but better than all poly crap. i tried on 3 styles of dresses and was so impressed with 2 of them i end up buying them despite one dress was £69, the other was £19 but it was only a simple long tank top dress. the 69 one looked a lot like an ann demeulemeester dress and it fitted well and it was all white, a lovely little number. now i vow i will not buy any more clothes in london..except a pair of nice sandals from clarks and cycling shorts from aa. after my little shopping spree i popped on the bus and went all the way from the west end to the east end to return some cds to the library and to print out nice pictures of my shoes.

phew, what a week. tomorrow i have to go to shehpard's bush market in the west end to get some fabric. have to...work on my design stuff. and i hope todd lynn office will contact me on monday. fingers cross. if i get an internship this summer, than i can get my visa to china and book tickets!!

but oh wait, i will have to finish this school year first. bummer.

alicia




eva

me trying to do a video blog entry but failed. here is the blooper

today when i was at chapters, a canadian chain of bookstore, i found haruki murakami's latest book on running. well, not exactly, but he did use running as an extensive example in the first chapter talking about his life and writing. than a great topic came to mind but i forgot. oh well.

now that i am back in toronto, how great. sunny every day! marvelous.
on the day i left london, on piccadilly line going to heathrow airport, i saw a girl...well, not exactly a girl but more of a woman sitting across from me smiling. i think she was smiling in my direction, or perhaps she was thinking of something funny and just happens to be looking my way. i didnt look directly at her of course, how awkward, so i stole glances and she was still smiling this...'i know something you dont know' smile. it felt odd. after being in so much gloom and doom of a city with obviously long faced bankers, it is odd to see this verging on chav-ness girl-woman stranger smiling at another stranger, me. though she did not look obviously masculine from head to bottom, she gave off this tough, i would say, dyke vibe. but her face was definitely once upon a time very pretty, that eastern european model look, feminine. it would be cliche for me to say age has robbed her of her youthful grace but it's true so i will say it anyways. sigh, there is something so sad about her.
the good and bad thing about riding the bus or the tube is occasionally you see these characters that are so memorable and interesting in the space of that few stops from station to station, that fleeting moment when you imagine the space of a whole of a stranger from that one impression and it is lost when either of you leaves the stage call public transportation.

saw a french movie yesterday called 'je vais bien, ne t'en fais pas'. man...im groaning.

so full everyday. gaining weight. whatever
i should take some singing lessons, it would be fun.

for a long time i have considered coco chanel (the original designer mind you, not the kaiser karl) nothing more than just a fancy stylist who came along to the fashion industry for a ride at a very good time. the great vionnet, and im being bias here (pun intended), quoted coco as the milliner, adding trimmings and taking pre-existing garments and using them in different context, which was true. she created the 'it' look. a while ago i was google searching 'coco chanel overrated' and found an interview like article on vivienne westwood, in it, she was talking about exactly what i just said and considered for a long time now, she also quoted chanel being overrated. odd i thought. suddenly i was reminded something my tailoring tutor said once on how around maybe 20 years ago, vivienne westwood would bullshit about traditional clothes making in fashion and the centuries of technical tests and trials but these years, it seems she's been praising the exact opposite. my tutor said, perhaps over the years she realize without those technicians, her fanciful designs would not come in existance. so true. it's funny how viv herself consider chanel overrated, and i consider vivienne westwood overrated, perhaps she knows that herself.
in the article, she praised ysl and dior and schiaparelli.
now here is my two cent, i dont dislike ysl but i have yet to find something amazing in him that makes me say, yes, he is definitely one of my favorite designers. perhaps i dont know his designs well enough. let's see, here is some of the most basic of what i do know of him. he popularized tuxedo on woman, that is not design so much that it's styling. he did that famous mondrian grid dress in the 60s, hum...he did collections inspired by safari hunting outfits. he used a lot of bright colors and ethnic inspired themes in the 80s. i dont know, none of these impress me.
dior...again, not someone that i greatly admire neither. so he was the 'it' designer of the 50s. he didn't invent the new look, it's not new at all, it had the same silhouette as the crinoline except shorter skirt and more modern styling.
schiaparelli, what about her? not dislike and not like. she definitely helped with modern day "student" like aesthetics.
so who do i admire a lot, well, cristobal balenciaga to begin with. vionnet is another. these two to me are probably the greatest to two designers in the 20th century. the fact that they experiment with cutting, the most basic of clothes making above anything else makes me admire them.

another thing i find interesting...image googling the designer's name. when the google research that comes up have more images of the designer him/herself or their fragrances or bags under their name than the actual clothes...
people say images speak louder than words and in this case it's very true. you can tell quite a lot about the name you are searching just by going through the pages of thumbnails.

this is china's version of mona lisa. get the drift? da vinci's mona lisa mystery is solved!
XD

xiaonei

today while i was on xiaonei looking at an album of funny images. i came across this rather...humorless picture of a woman in the arms of a man and kissing another man behind his back at the same time. it's not so much that the image itself is humorless, i was caught up in thinking something else, something familiar. i though, i know this image...it looks familiar. than i remember, i saw a sculpture by a chinese sculptor in the pompidou in june last year of the exact same scene! so i quickly did a google search and ah-ha. of course...

here is the original movie screen capture from the 2004 acclaimed movie, '3-iron' or 'bin-jip'.

xiaonei

here is wang du's sculpture in pompidou. i remember admiring it and thought it clever...but right after i realize what was going on..i cant help but feel slightly cheated. than researching some more, it appears the artist is known for taking images from media and "translating" it into his own. is this suppose to make me feel less cheated..? i dont know, but the bitter after taste is still here

artflicker

my mother told me to be happy, of course, i can. no, she told me to be happy when i go to school, i'm sorry, i can't. the complete honest truth, i do not like school, why? i do not enjoy what im learning. ok, change a course. no, but you see, it is good for me, it will help me, but i honestly detest it. you chose it, said she. of course, i know, but please do not tell me to be happy when i go to school because i am not. she said, being unhappy is not bad for anyone but yourself. ah, but you see, being unhappy and sighing as i go to school is the only way i can get through it or else if i am happy, i can chose not to go to school and completely ignore the reality of such institution. how morbid, ain't it. but that wouldnt be very approving now, right mother?
i have abandoned the idea of quitting school, how much more do you want to ask of me? be happy and go to school? please, for once let me be unhappy and finish school because it is all i am able to do. perhaps one day i will learn to like it

i long for the day when i can no longer distinguish between play and work because im so caught up in doing it all the time it become pleasurable.

i need to feel inspired. there is no inspiration in my life right now, which is making me desperate and going insane. probably scaring my housemates though, thinking there is a crazy girl just a few feet away.

on friday i went to selfridges because i wanted to look at some beautiful clothes. strangely, i couldnt find ann demeulemeester, but there were a lot of miu miu and a couple of balmains, which i laughed my ass off inside my head. the pieces and the prices was such a difference that i was thinking, who the fuck is going to buy this? saw some givenchy which was great too, they were lovely but not comparable to balenciaga which i saw right after. looking at balenciaga pieces up close was like that cliche, little kid going into a mountain high candy store with all these flavor lollipops you never imagined can exist. there weren't a lot of show pieces mind you, but whatever that was there made me question how the hell was this constructed. i thought they were ss09 but now that i think of it, it could be resort. i sure wish i can examine the pieces longer than i did, but the sales lady was watching me...occasionally coming over and asking if i need any help.
to be honest, if you ask me to describe what i saw, i would be stuck. the thing is, i almost dont remember a thing of what i saw, like the constructions of the garment or the details or the price or the material. kinda sad right. but now, i can remember fragments of little things like there was a pocket with tiny little chain details and black chiffon over white lace. i can't wait for the ss09 to hit the store! i want to see the ribbon dresses up close.